6/17/14
Verse 64
Dismiss your memories of each
object of interest,
which cause a state of
obstruction;
the vast expansive memory, which
can reveal
the priceless ultimate knowledge,
is not unjustified.
Free
translation:
Every object of perception evokes
a preconditioned memory, and one stumbles on its imagined consequences. Banish
all such frivolous memories. The only memory worth cherishing is one's primal
identification with the priceless, ultimate Knowledge.
Nataraja
Guru’s translation:
This which ever prevails, surmounting each interest-item,
One’s proper retrospection alone can compromise:
By means of extremely lucid memory, however, the revealing
Of ultimate wisdom-treasure is still not to be ruled out.
In
case we haven’t quite gotten the point of Narayana Guru’s subtle suggestions,
he offers us a direct instruction for practical application of them. Most of
our thoughts are trivial and ego-related. Instead of mindlessly following where
they lead, we can compare them to a more broadminded attitude and incorporate
as much of it as is justified. Nitya is also very direct about this:
Narayana Guru says here that by that
remembrance which is vast and expansive, where you are related with the whole
eternal universe, where the past, present and future are all taken as one
whole, and your relevance to it is made clear to you, that kind of remembrance
is a redeeming one. Live in your redeeming remembrance. In Vedanta this is
considered to be very central.
Enlarging
our perspective is utterly straightforward and simple, and yet due to our
habitual modes of thinking we seldom take the time for it. Happily, the class
offers an ideal practice ground that is quite compelling for us to do exactly
what the gurus suggest. I also invite those of you at home to send us your own
interpretations. This is a field where each of our examples will be readily
recognized by everyone else.
The
key idea, of exceptional importance, is that we don’t overdo the “dismissing”
of our self-identity. We retain it, only in expanded form. We used Deb as an
example: just a plain girl from the Midwest US, which is universally considered
the “square” part of the country. Many people from there stay stuck in being
square, but Deb was determined to leave it all behind her, and she has become a
much more universalized person. We still see and admire her roots because they
make her uniquely who she is, but she is not overly tied down to them.
That
has not always been true. Deb told a funny story of when she was first
traveling with Nitya in her early twenties. In those days she was trying so
hard to be cool and hip, the then-current cliché of what the “vast expansive
memory” meant. It's hard to imagine now, but back then being cool set you
apart. It was very exotic, and caused shock and horror among those striving to
hang on to what passed for normal. One day during their ego-trimming battles,
Nitya chided her, “You're just a prosaic American girl.” It was an arrow
straight to her heart, and it took her years to get over the pain it caused. It
was exactly how she didn't want to think of herself. But Nitya had skewered her
suppressed self-identity, freeing her to become more expansive. Real cool is
not a pose, or something to be conquered and assimilated. At heart it means
being yourself. Nitya had exploded the myth Deb had adopted. If she had been
truly cool, what he said would not have upset her. The fact that it did
revealed precisely where her pretensions lay.
The
guru principle of the universe is the force that sheds light on our unconscious
assumptions, allowing us to finally become aware of them. At such a crucial
moment the ordinary person clings to their limited identity. The yogi decides
to upgrade that identity with an enlarged self-image. By making the upgrade
habitual, expansion happens. It doesn’t happen if we just imagine we have got
it already. Brain studies have made clear that rewiring our neurons takes time
and repetitive effort.
Deb
was fortunate to have had a happy childhood where she was loved for what she
was. Some others in the class had more typical American upbringings where they
were taught to despise themselves. Fundamentalist Christians in particular
believe that children are born sinners who need to be tortured both physically
and mentally to become what they are supposed to be. The class examined how
pernicious the attitudes of self-loathing are in our culture. One had been sure
he was going to hell because he kissed a girl, and another was doomed because
he had gone to a movie theater. Simply realizing these ideas are ridiculous is
not enough, because doubts remain lodged deep in the psyche, and those specific
remembrances are merely the tip of a very, very large iceberg.
This
type of cruel upbringing is one major reason that draconian spiritual practices
are popular worldwide: they translate self-hatred into palatable terms that
promise success. But here the gurus are bypassing the whole morass, trying to
remind us we are just fine to begin with. If we can accept that, we will have
made a valid start to real transformation. In terms of Nitya’s commentary, the
idea is to not get hung up on dismissing aspects of our individuality in hopes
of becoming one with the Absolute, but continually subsuming those aspects in a
vast expansive outlook. A number of us have tried the “negate yourself”
approach and found how embittering and desolating it can be. Below the
self-suppression, twisted cravings seek ways to escape their bondage, and
develop into the kind of psychic horror stories we know all too well. Nitya
offers a very important caution about this:
When you meditate on this verse, if
you use only one limb of it, that is, not following up the memories caused by
the present environment, it becomes lopsided. This approach needs to be
complemented by remembering your greater identity. If all you do is reject your
personal memories, you become alienated from everything. But when you accept
the higher memory, all the barriers of individuality leave and you become
expansive.
What
is being spoken of here should not be made into a destructive kind of
meditation. As long as it is made expansive, there are no barriers between you
and the other. This fosters a greater love and greater freedom. This is of
critical importance.
Paul
has been noticing how the way parents treat their children is bound to have a
lasting impact on their lives in unintended ways. Like most of us, he doesn’t
see how he can intervene, but he would like to. He knows you don’t grow loving
people by treating them harshly, but by demonstrating love. This is another way
to put this verse into practice, by observing the likely impact of treatment on
the delicate minds of children, and then positing a healthier alternative.
Rather than intervene directly, there are less confrontive ways to improve the
situation. Plus, we can always use the example to be sure we don’t retain the
same faults. And while we’re at it, why not treat adults kindly, too?
This
highlights one of the most important repackagings we can implement. Most of us
are taught we are inadequate. We are convinced that the important people and
events of life are happening somewhere else, and we don’t really matter. We
have to become model human beings before we’re okay. All such thoughts sabotage
our value as unique individuals. As yogis we should root out these falsehoods
and replace them with ideals like we are essential to the flow of life. There
is nothing more important than our life right here and now. It’s actually
shocking all the ways we downplay our value, because it’s so much a part of our
culture we don’t even notice, like the ocean to a fish.
Narayana
Guru looked out upon a sea of miserable humans and saw how amazing each of them
was. He wanted to tell everyone how much they mattered, how much they were
capable of. Here and there people heard his message, and were transformed. If
we take his kindhearted and intelligently honed ideas to heart, we too can
embody the priceless ultimate knowledge he is calling us to.
The
really weird part is that we tend instead to take on the punitive attitudes of our
caregivers. They are no longer around, but we dutifully act out their
persecution of us, because subconsciously we agree that we have to be swept
aside to make room for the honorable, “holy” people God wants to have around.
This
is utter bullshit, of course, but still we believe it.
So
the very first thing we can do by way of curing our ills is to stop persecuting
ourself. Whenever we notice we’re doing it, we can substitute an awareness of
our irreplaceable uniqueness. Even if no one else is ever going to notice the
change, we can notice. We can be our own best friend.
Mick
told a lovely story about when he was facing a jail term of up to seven years,
for the kind of victimless crime that Americans love to harshly penalize. At
the time he was feeling dreadful about screwing up and wrecking his family’s
happy life, so in addition to the awful prospects he was facing he was beating
up on himself, undoubtedly quite heavily as he had been taught, adding
immensely to the burden. He was in the ceramic studio throwing pots, when a
hummingbird became trapped in the rather large building. Although his hands
were covered with clay, he had to get the bird outside. Hummingbirds can’t be
driven out a door; they’re too quick and just dart around. After some futile attempts,
Mick started to concentrate on telepathic communication with the bird, sending
it peaceful, loving thoughts. When he brought himself to a calm state, the bird
flew over and hovered in front of him. Mick extended his left hand, and the
bird alit on his finger. He walked gingerly outside with it, but the bird
didn’t leave immediately. Instead it turned away from him and used its beak to
rub his finger, very gently, three times. Then it turned back and looked at him
before flying away, likely as a gesture of thanks. Mick understood it also as
an expression of forgiveness, a bird blessing, and he knew that he shouldn’t
run himself down just because of his unfortunate circumstances. Needless to
say, Mick was blown away. The bird helped him accomplish just what Narayana
Guru recommends here: moving from the pinch of outward conditioning amplified
by self-loathing, to the vast loving beingness that is the true home of our
spirit.
Nitya
expresses the liberating idea of this verse perfectly in his free translation:
“Every object of perception evokes a preconditioned memory, and one stumbles on
its imagined consequences.” Those are the impediments we are asked to
surrender. Especially we should stop imagining consequences! This parallels the
Gita’s advice to not have expectations. Expectations are totally grounded in
what we think we already know, and therefore close off most of the unexpected
outcomes, usually including the optimal ones. It’s much better to wait and see
what will happen. But before that we should relinquish our fixed notions and
the unwitting assumptions they generate. Nitya counsels us not to throw the
baby out with the bathwater:
It is not an easy thing to reject all
these memories. But the Guru asks us to at least break away from our personal
memories, which bring regrets, remorses and anxieties; and, if we turn towards
the future, to break away from the echo of our memory that comes in the form of
fantasies.
Deb really got from this how our
fantasies are just repackaged memories, ways we hope to re-experience the past
in the future. Fantasies really are echoes of the past projected as a renewed
possibility. We may believe they are insinuations from the Absolute leaking
into our awareness, but when that happens it’s something else: what we call
creative intuition. Nitya is right that fantasies are the embodiment of our
desires, fully based on past experiences, so they interfere with creative
inspiration rather than fostering it. It’s a bit tricky to distinguish the one
from the other, especially since we tend to favor our fantasies. We can help
each other sort out the difference.
So
let’s close with some examples of what we should be drawing from this verse. We
already saw how Deb is both a “prosaic American” and an open-minded, universal
contemplative. Nitya described a similar perspective about himself:
The realization of the higher Self
does not mean you should abstract everything and make it only a theoretical
possibility. It is to be lived here and now in its most expansive sense. People
who come to these classes here in America do not know my parentage; they know
nothing of my school days. They know little or nothing of the particular
culture in which I was raised. None of these things are necessary for us to
relate in a free way with an open mind. They think, “This is a person who
speaks of certain experiences of living truth.” That's enough.
So do we peer at people and keep
them at a distance based on their superficial characteristics, or do we look
for their humanity and resonate with that? We didn’t talk about it in class,
but the fellow Nitya was taking to India with him, who was only a tangential
participant in the class, failed in this respect. Nitya wrote, “For instance, a
friend here is going to India with me soon. How does this apply to him? If he
thinks of himself merely as an Oregonian doing business, then India will be a
very foreign country for him, with an exotic culture and incomprehensible ways
of life. On the other hand, if he can think of himself as an ordinary human being
belonging to the whole world, he will be very much at home.” I don’t know many
of the details, but I do recall the guy being miserable and angry when he got
home. He was someone who held on tight to his narrow definition of self. I can
well imagine that doing business is a particularly stressful test of one’s
humanity, and that a lot of practice would be necessary to keep the gurus’
advice alive in the heart. It’s a reminder that we all need to practice these
ideas regularly, not just give them a nod.
One
idea I have used and shared with my musician friends could be applied to public
speaking or other nerve-wracking events. Nearly all musicians get nervous
before they perform, and it often causes mistakes and inferior playing. Being
nervous is viewed negatively. I suggest that we are not really nervous, only
excited. We are keyed up, and that can be very good for performance. So if we
think of ourselves as excited we will do better that if we think of ourselves
as nervous. It works! Even just hearing the idea is a relief for many
musicians. They instinctively sense it’s true.
I’ve
already told so many of my own stories, I want to hear from others. I’ll just
mention that situations that cause fear and dread can be reimagined as
opportunities to learn and grow, and then that’s what they become. There is no
reason to give in to our habitual gut reaction to avoid challenges. With a
couple of trials we can learn how exciting it is to leap over our mental
hurdles and connect with someone we might be inclined to avoid. Narayana Guru’s
gentle suggestions are colossal blasts of curative energy if we dare to take
them seriously.
Part II
Neither This Nor That But . . . Aum:
Mind
is never at rest. It is always inquisitive, wanting to know what is happening
around. It looks through the windows of perception. Anything that catches its
attention is immediately linked to an associated idea. Associations are not
always strongly linked like cause and effect; in fact, even a remote
resemblance can be more than enough to keep the mind jumping from one memory to
another. Memory brings along the emotional colouration of a previous event and
this is relived, vividly sometimes, vaguely at other times, and sometimes with
exaggerated sentiments. Bergson speaks of it as the pulling of the thread out
of a ball of yarn. It has no end. It keeps on coming and coming with bunches of
forgotten events and people.
Memory
has its echo in the indulgence of futuristic fantasy. When memory is
retrospective, it becomes regret and remorse, and when it is prospective, it
becomes anxiety. On the whole memory is tied up with worries.
Pavlov
exemplified the conditioning of the reflexes by his famous experiment with the
dogs that salivated at the sound of a buzzer. This phenomenon of conditioning
permeates the entire field of learning. In Sanskrit, the storing of the memory
of an impression is called samskāra. Samskāra means culturing or processing. An
impression is processed to become a conditioned state. When a conditioned
memory is further consolidated it becomes a vāsana, an incipient memory.
Another
name for Eros is smaran, the one who reminds. All desires are evoked by the
urge to enjoy. The urge to enjoy is like the sprout sleeping in a seed; it
wakes up when conditions are favourable. The antidote to smaran is smaraharan
(the burner of erotic memories), or
Siva. The intensity of Siva's
third eye burns away the impulses that create unwholesome craving. In the
Bhagavad Gita, pure knowledge is glorified as a fire that burns away the dross
of action. Memories that bring anxieties and worries should be discarded with
discernment. The word pratibandham given in this verse is to be taken as the
obstruction of the Real which is veiled by clusters of relativistic memories.
We
wake up to the memories of the phenomenal because we have forgotten the
original memory of our real identity. In reality we are the pure existence of
absolute happiness, sat-cit-ānanda. If this is remembered, it will cure us from
the ills of all relativistic memories.
*
* *
Nataraja
Guru’s commentary:
THE mind as an inner organ of thought or consciousness can
be related to the future or
the past. Interests having a prospective or a retrospective content can fill the
mental field
by establishing a bipolar relation with any one at a time. Items of interest
thus succeed each other, holding the centre of the field of attention at a
given time with each person. Just as a river flows forward, overcoming
obstacles such as stones that hinder its progress; so the forward-flowing or
prospective function, which is a corollary of the orientation of the spirit to
the future ideological end or purpose in life, consists of overcoming
impediments in the form of interests of various degrees and
kinds which happen to hold
back the attention of man at any given time. These interests are good for spiritual
progress even
in their most ordinary levels or degrees only in so far as they offer footholds
for the ascent of the spirit by convenient steps through their means to ever
higher levels, so
as to prevail finally in self-realization of the highest or
absolute value
The enemy of such a process of positive progression is the
retrospective orientation of the spirit which is often filled with the dross of
personal reminiscences which result in regrets or regression of the spirit
harmful to a healthy psychic life. Reminiscent moods are often signs of mental
debility or advanced old
age. Items of regret can effectively compromise or counter the forward impetus that leads
to the goal
of absolute Self-realization. The harm done by retrospection and regret to the
soul in its progress to the goal is described in the forceful language of the
German philosopher Nietzsche in his book Thus Spake Zarathustra (Page 153,
Random House, New York, N. Y., U. S. A.)
Willing emancipateth; but
what is that called which ‘It was thus’ is the will’s teeth-gnashing and
lonesomest tribulation called. Impotent towards what hath been done – it
is a malicious spectator of all that is past. That time doth not run backward –
that is its animosity. ‘That which was’ – so is the stone which it cannot roll
called.
Over and above this generalization about the evil of
retrospection the Guru’s
verse contains a kind of safety-valve pertaining to the same question. All
retrospection is not to be ruled out. When the Isa Upanishad says;
0 purpose (kratu), remember:
The deed (krita) remember
0 purpose remember, the deed
remember.
There is still a two-sided allusion to the item of
retrospection or remembrance
retained in principle. There is a lucid form of pure memory transparent to purpose and
to
what is past
and gone for ever. Such a lucid form of retrospection, with double reference to
the past as well as to the future, has the same effect as digging for a
treasure trove that is hidden under the ground and finding it, and the Guru
here accepts this kind of pure retrospection, approximating to a form of
general awareness, as conducive, in principle at least, to the end of
contemplative Self-realization.
Part III
Mick
told us about a new cat that he is completely in love with, and the cat is
equally in love with him. He waxed rhapsodic about their relationship, as if he
wanted to be sure it was okay with us to feel that way. He was raised in one of
the “tough male” models so prevalent in the older cultures. I’m sure he was
reassured that we at least didn’t believe it was healthy to suppress our
feelings. Mick’s cat enthusiasm brought to mind one of Nataraja Guru’s quotes:
“When a beautiful fat housecat rolls in the sunlight, that is yoga.” I also reread
the part from near the end of verse 48, which I’ll expand a bit because of its
relevance. Nitya was speaking about how we have to extend our boundaries beyond
the limits of our body, and that is a kind of realization. He adds:
This
is reestablished in our lives every day. When you pick up a cat and say “my
dear kitty,” you have already gone beyond your bodily limitations and your own
body identity. People do not realize that this itself is part of your
realization. Of course, it needs to be further perfected. When you say someone
is a realized person, it is not that she hugs a cat. There’s a bit more to it.
But you make a beginning just by hugging the cat.
A big myth is now exploded with this
verse. You have now come so close to the experience of the Absolute. It is
within your reach, in the palm of your hand, so to speak. When Jesus says, “The
kingdom of God is at hand, close to you, within your own heart,” people still
doubt it. They say “if it is so close, where are the signs? Why are the clouds not
becoming all pink and red? Why aren’t the trees bursting forth in light and the
sound of God’s own voice?” Jesus says, “Ye hypocrites! I give you no signs.”
All the religious words have frightened and confused us.
Narayana Guru wants to give us courage, telling us, “Don’t be afraid. You are
as good as anyone. The essence of realization is in your own daily experience.”
With this realization you come to establish a universal norm for living that
experience with others, not just in a state of absorption.
*
* *
Peg
sent a snapshot of one of her favorite thinkers:
63/64 verses, and the class
notes—which I read and treasure—brought this to mind. Sending much
love/gratitude to all.
Kazimierz Dabrowski
(1902-1980) was a Polish psychiatrist and psychologist who, among
many profound and useful theories/incites, developed this
typology of emotional development and his Theory of Positive Disintegration.
(from a Karen Nelson
article...) “IQ tests give us one means of understanding and describing
differences between individuals. But how do we understand and measure the
quality of the differences we perceive between Klaus Barbie and Mother Teresa
of Calcutta, between Dag Hammarskjold and Adolf Hitler? Kazimierz Dabrowski's
theory of emotional development--or Theory of Positive Disintegration, as
Dabrowski called it to emphasize the role of suffering and inner conflict in
advancing development--gives us a framework for understanding these
qualitatively different levels of human development.”
Kazimierz Dabrowski's
typology/levels of emotional development:
I. Dominant concern with self-protection and survival;
self-serving egocentrism; instrumental view of others
(Dog-eat-dog mentality)
II. Lack of inner direction; inner fragmentation--many selves; submission
to the values of the group; relativism of values and beliefs
(A reed in the wind)
III. Sense of the ideal but not
reaching it; moral concerns; higher vs lower in oneself
(Video meliora proboque deteriora sequor
-Marcus Tullius Cicero)
IV. Self-actualization;
ideals and actions agree; "what ought to be, will be," strong sense
of responsibility
(Behind tranquility lies conquered
unhappiness -Eleanor Roosevelt)
V. Life inspired by a powerful ideal, e.g. equal rights, world
peace, universal love and compassion , sovereignty of all nations
(A magnetic field in the soul -Dag
Hammarskjold)
---
As well as his poem (1970):
Hail to you, psychoneurotics,
For you perceive sensibility
in the insensibility of the world,
uncertainty in its certainty.
For you are often as conscious of others
as of yourself,
For you feel the anxiety of the world,
its limits and its false unlimited assurance...
For your fear of the absurdity of existence.
...For your awkwardness,
for your transcendental
realism
and your lack of daily
realism...
For your creativity and your ecstasy,
For your maladjustment to what is
and your adjustment to what
ought to be,
For your immense possibilities not yet actualized...
For what is unique, original, intuitive and infinite in you.
For the solitude and the oddness of your paths.
Hail to you.
---
Thanks,
Peggy Grace Chun
*
* *
We’ve
heard from John after a fairly long respite:
This brings to mind several things.
There's an old saying in the South: "You become what you
hate." While I don't
hate my parents, I find, in reflection, that I had un-mindfully taken on their
best, and worst, traits.
As for association - yes, I hear stuff like that all the
time. A friend told me that she
had two very bad Tri-Met [bus] rides and so she will never ride on the Tri-Met
again. I rode Tri-Met for 35
years until I got into the appraisal biz and I couldn't get to the appraisals
that way - and yes, I had bad rides, great rides, and mostly, just rides. And
though I try to take
everything as it comes, as it is, and be open -
there's like this voice that wants me to make some kind of
judgment or something about it.
IN some cases, I suspect that this is a self-defense mechanism - I mean,
I remember as a child sticking a knife into an electric socket to see what
would happen. Yup - I got a
sound shock, and caused a pop, snap crackle, and burnt the knife a bit. So,
yes, associations have their
place. But I think the key is to be mindful - ever mindful - to know
why you are doing what you are doing - why you are careful when you are careful
-and such - as opposed to knee jerk reactions based on neurons firing that you
aren't even trying to figure out.
Whew, what a winter and spring. Ah - this weekend, I long to get my victory garden going!
Much L to all
PS - don't stick knives into electric sockets until you want
to see sparks and get a shock.
Upside, you get a light show that's pretty far out - and as for the
shock, well, I wouldn't recommend it, but at least you know your body is still
functioning property.
*
* *
And
from Pratibha:
Yes his ideas are colossal, creative blasts that we all can
apply.
I can affirm that I used to get nervous worried while
driving to teach; I began to say affirmations of courage and success for that
day's class. My mind settled more peacefully and class always went well after
doing these affirmations, sometimes a mantra.
So we do have free will and choices when we truly embrace
them.
regards to all,
Pratibha
*
* *
Jake’s
commentary:
In
this verse, the Guru once again presents his central theme of our need to dwell
on and in the Absolute while going about our daily business. Here, however, he
offers a view that,
at first blush, flies in the face of what is a bedrock conviction held by most,
especially those buried in contemporary American culture and its public notions
of virtue. Within the parameters
of this model, family or home-of- origin memories assume defining contours and
go a long way in explaining one’s adult condition. In Indian psychology, writes Nitya in his commentary, these
experiences (among others) are called samskaras,
that which processes lived experience of the present life into memory (largely
out of awareness until excavated later in life often through talk therapy).
In
completing this explanation of that which motivates our behavior, Nitya adds
the notion of vssanas: “the refined
essence of memory that the life form carries over to its new body [as it passes
from life to life]. These
incipient memories are those with which a newly born child begins life’
(p.438). It is the combination of
the two that we call memory, which is, in turn, that which we connect to
experiences as they arrive in the material world. In short, as we go about our business our memories lie
dormant ready to “sprout” whenever the environment presents us with an occasion
to which we can attach them.
Because our memory reaches so far back into the eons, our mind’s
capacity to articulate the details is possible only to a very partial degree,
and “what is retained in memory is not exactly as you have lived it. It
is more like a caricature of it” (p.
439) and follows no logic the mind can attach to. Memories are in charge as long as the process remains out of
awareness, and in all cases the very nature of them leads us back to the
circular path of samsaric misery.
As Nitya reminds us, even pleasant memories are tinged with regret
because of their being over with and not available in the present moment. They
are available only as they are
lived as actual events that ever appear and disappear. Because they are a quality
of the
immanent, they are part and parcel of that which is not.
This
timeless system, carried through our bodies as we come and go has a direct
effect on their nervous systems, writes Nitya. Memories are embedded in and “have roots in the past.”
Excavating them can cause disability or
disease in extreme cases. Always
associated with objects of interest, memories as they boil up act to obstruct
and distort direct perception of the Absolute and in them is contained the
energy of eros (which is the power of any object-centered urge and not to be
narrowly understood as the sex urge.)
That combination of energy and memory constitute a powerful and
continuous assault on self meant to distract it and turn its attention to those
items of interest, which are also so highly prized particularly in American
culture. Family bonds are of
particular significance as are those associated with one’s larger “families” of
gender and ethnic group. In all
these cases, the assumed-stabilizing anchor is thoroughly embedded in the
transient domain of that which is not.
As with any convention founded on illusion, the holding fast to it
demands that we construct and continuously reinforce our denial of that which is
the Absolute when glimmers of it
pierce the fog now and then, a miasma our minds weave out of memory and its
mirror image, fantasy—the memory echo we cast into the future.
All
of this activity is mind-conjured and tied to our personal ego-self we hold so
dear. This “superficial
remembrance that you are so and so,” writes Nitya, “is a memory that limits
you, but if you remember you are the Absolute it will sublate all those
binding, relativistic remembrances” (p. 441).
Coming
to terms with the reality of the Self and the passing shadow of our mind’s
ego-self places much of what is prized in American life into a secondary
category. Family, ethnic group,
gender, or even national identification are revealed as the illusions they are
the more clearly one comes to realize the Absolute oneness. Because of this inevitable
development
if we choose to pursue awareness, Nitya counsels us to hold fast to that which
is while we meditate on this vision and incorporate it into our lives as we
live them here and now. Letting go
of the notion that personal memory is true in favor of a larger, eternal truth,
requires that we, as Ken Wilber phrases it, “transcend and include.” The
Absolute is no dry abstraction;
living the Absolute includes living in the All: “Always, the narrow shell of
relationship is to be discarded in favor of a wider on” (p. 442).
Part IV
Although
Verse 65 elaborates on the idea of the vast expansive memory of this verse
(64), Peggy sent this as a follow up to her first email, so I’ll include it
now:
PS: Re creative performance friends comment...
I've found the following framing for the fear
sensation/biochem (aka performance anxiety, or fight/flight, and the crazy
thinking that can accompany this) to be quite useful. Consultant Tara Mohr
advises...
Don't run, and don't go on the attack. Evaluate. There's a difference between the fear you feel
when your life is at risk (tiger
leaping at your neck), and the fear you feel when you're taking a risk.
"The late Rabbi Alan Lew talked about how in Hebrew
there are many words for fear," she says. You can calm down and figure out
how to take action by identifying which kind you're feeling. "Pachad" is the innate
biological response that turns us into an irrational, Hulk-like mess. If you're
not actually clinging to survival, pachad is imaginary - meaning the
face-burning panic you feel before giving a speech is no more real than what
you feel during a suspenseful scene in a movie. Know it for what it is,
suggests Mohr.
The other kind of fear is "yirah," a word which means something close to awe in English. This
is existential
fear -- the fear of standing up for yourself, being who you are, or realizing
your full potential. Mohr describes yirah as the "sacred, trembling feeling" that we encounter at the
possibility of the future. This type of fear can be powerful, if you recognize
it. It is the deep anxiety many of us bring to the unknown.
The next time you have
to make a difficult decision or find a new approach, ask yourself whether the
butterflies in your stomach signal a genuine possibility of harm, or "the
sacredness of what you're touching."
(Scott here): This is really right to the point. Thank you,
Peg. Though the presumption in Eastern spirituality is often that we should
cremate all our vasanas, the Gita and
the Gurukula gurus are in favor of promoting the best and torching the only the
worthless or detrimental ones. I believe that the feeling we label as
“nervousness” is often the eager anticipation of our thwarted vasanas sensing
an all-too-rare opportunity to express themselves: essentially what Peggy is
saying in different terms. We have learned to think of the sensation
negatively, so we unwittingly wind up continuing the suppression. No wonder we
make mistakes in such a mood! Remembering that our best abilities only
sporadically get the chance to manifest—and this is the central meaning of our
life, after all—will put a much more positive spin on performance anxiety no
matter what the circumstances.
*
* *
Baird
also weighed in on roughly the same topic, first creating a composite of
Nitya’s and my comments, and then adding his astute example:
... "Every object of perception evokes a preconditioned
memory, and one stumbles on its imagined consequences." Those are the
impediments we are asked to surrender. Especially we should stop imagining
consequences! ... Guru asks us to at least break away from our personal
memories, which bring regrets, remorses and anxieties; ... situations that
cause fear and dread can be reimagined as opportunities to learn and grow, and
then that's what they become.
Along these lines, a practice which I find helpful is to
remind myself that worrying is just using my imagination to create something I
DO NOT want, and then be thankful for the negative thought because it provides
the CONTRAST I need to think about what I DO want.
